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  1. Wed., Oct. 6

    by , October 6th, 2010 at 08:35 PM (The FAF AFAP Digest)
    Out of the water today and will be tomorrow as well. Got a huge night sleep though, and hoping for another.

    Interesting reading:

    SwimNetwork:

    http://www.swimnetwork.com/News/Swim...paign=Facebook

    Triathlon Magazine:

    Interesting preview of Kona in this month's edition. And an extensive article on overhauling nutrition, making some of these points (some of which are obvious and we've discussed before):

    1. Eat more, weight less. Eat right after training or you'll be hungry later.

    2. Eat enough calories to avoid a negative energy state. If you don't eat enough, you'll teach your body to store fat, not burn it.

    3. To promote recovery, eat a healthy meal right after exercising, not beer and burgers. Doh.

    4. Avoid caffeine, which leads to stress, poor sleep, digestive problems, depression and interferes with the body's ability to tone up and burn fat.

    5. Don't switch from dairy to sodas. Sodas can deplete the mineral content of your bones and inflame the appetite.

    6. Don't just drink water to hydrate. Have something with electrolytes.

    7. Don't diet before a big race as it could compromise your immune system.

    8. Ginger helps to reduce post workout muscle soreness.


    Splash Magazine:

    "Profile of a Sprinter," excerpts:

    "Sprinters personify the saying, work smarter, not harder. Every lap in the pool is preceded by "why" and followed by a "why more?"

    Salo states that "sprinters are simply different from swimming's mainstream." They are "just as committed to excellence" and "always focused on competition" whereas the D swimmers like the training process more. Sprinters "value speed" and don't talk about "aerobic base."

    Others say "sprinters won't practice from a menu" ... but "the need for variety doesn't correlate with a lack of focus." They are "intensely curious about what techniques and drills will enhance speed."


    Triathlon:

    Growing Ironman:

    http://online.wsj.com/article/SB1000...le_Lifestyle_6

    Sewickley friends competing:

    http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/pitt.../s_702161.html

    Updated October 7th, 2010 at 11:22 AM by The Fortress

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  2. Sarasota Y Sharks Masters 5:30 AM Workout: 10/07/10

    by , October 6th, 2010 at 08:14 PM (Sarasota Y Sharks Masters 5:30 a.m. Workout)
    SCY
    WARM UP:
    2 X 200 3:00 3:00
    4 X 100 1:40 1:30
    Twice through. Round 1 intervals left, 2 right

    1 X 100 IM
    1 X 100 Stroke
    1 X 100 free
    Three times through.
    All swims on 1:45

    1 X 200 kick 4:10
    2 X 100 kick 2:10
    4 X 50 kick 1:00
    8 X 25 sprint kick :45
    Short break before the 25's

    2 X 100 moderate 1:45
    6 X 50 odd:fast even:easy 1:00
    4 X 25 sprint :45
    Three rounds. Short break after 2 rounds.

    WARM DOWN: 4 X 50 easy 1:00

    5300Y
    Categories
    Swim Workouts
  3. My favorite set so far:

    I'm not usually one to blog about my workouts - but last night I had a super challenging and fun set. The design was relatively simplistic, but the overall affect was fantastic! I couldn't sleep for hours.

    18 x 100

    Super simple, but broken down it was actually a little more than just that.

    3 x {
    2 x {
    3 x 100
    1st Set: 1 & 2 on 1:45, 3 on 1:40
    2nd Set: 1 & 2 on 1:40, 3 on 1:35
    3rd Set: All 3 on 1:45 w/ last 25 sprint
    }
    Rest 30 sec
    }

    During the 1st set - I was doing really well! 10-15 seconds rest on the 1:45 and 5-10 seconds rest on the 1:40.

    During the 2nd set - I was doing alright for the first half. After that 1:35 I got less than 2 seconds rest. So the 4th 100 I was getting less than 5 seconds rest, I decided to pull the 5th and managed to wing about 10 seconds rest. I'm a much faster puller.

    Finally during the 3rd set, I died off. My first 3 100s were okay, but my last 3 were terrible. I was barely making 1:45 at the end.

    In conclusion - that set rocked my world. It was fun, it was fast and I would love to do 1,000 more like it. The end.
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  4. Wed Oct 6th, 2010 NOON

    by , October 6th, 2010 at 02:58 PM (Ande's Swimming Blog)
    Wed Oct 6th, 2010

    I needed todays swim. I forgot practice was 7:30 am and not 5:15 am

    Subscribe to Ande's Swimming Blog

    scy
    Bess Coached
    noon to 1:00
    UT Swim Center
    swam with james fike & sharon
    dove in around
    12:05 ish
    brief

    WARM UP
    assigned 600
    did around 300

    MAIN SET

    did 3 rounds of
    4 x 25 on 20
    3 x 50 on 40
    2 x 75 on 1:00
    1 x 100 on 1:20
    rest a bit
    400 neg split which I did easy 200 fr on 2:40 200 fr faster
    rest about a minute
    1) 2:25 2:17
    2) 2:25 2:16
    3) 2:30 2:05

    did around 3000
    Categories
    Swim Workouts
  5. Wed Oct 6th 2010

    by , October 6th, 2010 at 12:43 PM (Ande's Swimming Blog)
    Wed Oct 6th 2010

    did not swim Sat, Sun, Mon or Tue

    went to Boston for fun and work,
    saw Sox vs Yankees on Sunday,
    got home last night around Midnight
    missed this morning's 5:15 am practice

    My personal life is still very stressful and difficult.

    Hope to swim at noon
    Categories
    Swim Workouts
  6. Wednesday, 10/6/10

    by , October 6th, 2010 at 11:52 AM (A comfort swimmer's guide to easy swimming)
    SCY, Solo

    Warm up
    300 Mixer 150 free-100 back-50 fly
    4 x 50/1:00 ds (back 45->41)
    8 x 25/30: #1 - 1st 12 1/2 fast, #2 - 2nd 12 1/2 fast, #3 - 25 easy, #4 - 25 fast
    (1-4 free, 5-8 back)

    Kick
    1 x 300 Choice of Kick - may use fins, no board
    (on side with fins and snorkel)
    8 x 50 + 25 /5sr in between both
    50's are steady effort - 25's are strong
    (alternated by 2's free w board/flutter on back. 50's were 58-1:00, 25's were around 22 for free, 24 for back)

    Swim
    Repeat Set 5 Times:
    1 x 100/1:45 smooth
    2 x 50/45 strong
    (1-3 free, 100's around 1:26-28, 50's around 37
    4-5 back 100's 133-34, 50's around 42; changed interval to 50 for these)

    Cool down
    200 easy free and back

    Total: 2800 yards
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  7. Wednesday 10/6/10

    by , October 6th, 2010 at 10:43 AM (The Labours of SwimStud)
    Well I pulled a muscle in my upper back when I fluffed my pillow the other night…yes I know it’s ridiculous but it happens.
    So I set off with some trepidation to workout this morning. I warmed up easy and had no issues so it’s just one of those little things. I‘m going to swerve weight lifting today to give it time to heal.

    Warm Up
    600 FR
    10 x 50 K 1:30

    Main
    4 x 100 FR 1:40 Desc. Maybe didn’t hit the desc fully but I had 1:18 is on #1 and 1:12 on #4 so I did well.
    3 x 200 FR. IM, FR by 100
    2 x 300 100 IMOK, 100 FR, 100 IMOK
    1 x 400

    Cool
    500 Fin Kick
    400 EZ
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  8. We go together like traffic and weather

    by , October 6th, 2010 at 09:25 AM (Too Neurotic to be Suitably Aquatic)
    Coach is having some kind of problem with the calcium levels in the pool this week. I don't know if it's mental or what, but as a result my lungs and face feel like they're on fire. Might also have something to do with swimming more than I'm used to with a faster lane. And that I have to drive home to shower instead of doing it immediately because we have to vacate the locker rooms by 7:30, and that's not enough time for me.

    So this is what we swam today:

    25 dive start!
    4x100 s, k, p, s
    200 rev. IM
    5x100 descend on 1:40
    8x50, 1st 25 1 breath,
    8x25 kick fast
    6x50 odd free even choice
    4x100 IM
    8x50 descend on 1:00
    2x100 fast
    200 warm down

    didn't get to...
    8x25 kick
    2x50 under / over
    2x50 choice
    200 warm down

    There's one guy in my lane who when he kicks, mimics the fountains of Bellagio in Vegas. And if I swim behind him, I can't see a damn thing due to severe bubbleage. So I've been giving him a wide berth of 5 seconds or more, which is leading to the problem of me getting too far behind because he is faster than me. Our lane leader can catch up to me at the 200. I've been in this situation before, and it made me a faster swimmer, just so I could get out in front to some clear water. I'm keeping positive by looking at this as an opportunity instead of a detriment, but in the meantime, my arms are really sore.
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  9. Distance Day Today

    by , October 6th, 2010 at 07:32 AM (Mixing it up this year)
    This was my distance day since I haven't done much in a while.

    5x100@1:30 Free just barely made them
    5x100@1:30 Free kick w/fins just barely made these too
    10x200@3:00 Free w/paddles & bouy 1-5 held 2:45's then descended 6-10 going 2;44, 2:43, 2:42, 2:41, 2:38
    5x100@1:30 Free kick w/fins just barely made these
    5x100@1:40 Free 1-3 held 1:30's then EASY last 2

    Total 4000 yards
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  10. Early October workouts

    by , October 5th, 2010 at 10:01 PM (Elise's Fitness Fun)
    Yikes! I'm going to have to get back in the habit of blogging again. Here is what I have done since I last blogged:

    Saturday, October 2
    Swam 20 minutes (nonstop) in open water

    Sunday
    Weights:
    Bench press: bar x 12, 65 x 10, 75 x 8
    Lat pull-down: 90 x 12, 100 x 10, 110 x 8
    Leg press: 130 x 12, 150 x 10, 170 x 8
    Hammer curls: 2 sets of 10 x 10

    2 sets of 20 Ls
    2 sets of 20 back extensions

    Monday
    2 mile walk/run

    Tuesday
    1800 SCY:

    Warm-up - 200 swim, 200 pull, 200 kick

    4 x 25 with fins: underwaters on :30

    4 x 75 dolphin on back with fins on 1:00

    100 easy kick

    4 x 75 fly drill on 1:30 - first 25 is 4 rt/4 lt/4 full fly strokes, second 25 is 3 rt/3 lt/3 full, last 25 is 2 rt/2 lt/2 full

    4 x 50 dolphin kick with board - no fins - on 1:00

    4 x 25 fly with fins AFAP

    100 easy
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  11. Excruciatingly Slow Swim, Tuesday, Oct. 5

    by , October 5th, 2010 at 08:11 PM (The FAF AFAP Digest)
    Rest apparently didn't help. I dragged myself to the pool this morning after making African masks with 4th graders and did this measley bit o yardage:

    Swim/SCY/Solo:

    Warm up:

    600 various

    Slow 50s:

    12 x 50 @ 1:00
    reverse IM order, drill fly

    10 x 50 backstroke kick @ 1:00

    50 EZ

    Total: 1750


    Doc Visits:

    Went in for an evaluation and PRP with Dr. Wagner. MRI shows arthritis, tenosynovitis and degradation of the tendons. Only two options are surgery and PRP. I opted for PRP. Unlike with my shoulder, however, they don't numb the foot when doing the procedure, which involves multiple injections right into the tendons and joint. It was excruciatingly painful. I'm supposed to be hobble free by Thursday. Another round of injections in 4 weeks. Now that's something to look forward to! Of course, this is all necessary if I ever want to wear high heels again. Interestingly, he had seen a tri, a swimmer and a runner before me.

    As I was still feeling awful, I dragged myself to Immediate Care. Diagnosis: bronchitis. Real shocker there. Starting antibiotics.


    Commentary:

    Today, I was trying to stay in the water as Jimslie suggested. I'm just not sure how much this helps. I certainly didn't feel better afterward. I think this week is going to be a write off training wise. Kinda frustrating. I was just getting back in a nice groove.

    Updated October 5th, 2010 at 09:04 PM by The Fortress

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  12. Sarasota Y Sharks Masters 5:30 AM Workout -10/06/10

    by , October 5th, 2010 at 04:11 PM (Sarasota Y Sharks Masters 5:30 a.m. Workout)
    SCY
    WARM UP:
    3 X 100 1:40
    1 X 300 4:30
    4 X 100 1:30
    1 X 400 negative split

    1 X 200 kick 4:10
    4 X 75 kick 1:40
    1 X 100 kick 2:10
    4 X 50 kick 1:00

    1 X 100 IM 1:454
    1 X 75 stroke 1:30
    1 X 50 stroke 1:15
    Four times through. IM'ers go one round of each on stroke swims.

    1 X 400 5:45
    3 X 100 1:30 1:25 1:20
    Three times through. 100 intervals round 1 left, 2 middle, 3 right.

    WARM DOWN: 4 X 50 easy 1:00

    5300Y
    Categories
    Swim Workouts
  13. Wednesday, 10/5/10

    by , October 5th, 2010 at 01:07 PM (A comfort swimmer's guide to easy swimming)
    SCY, Solo

    Warm up
    300 swim back & free
    200 IM drill
    100 kick on side with snorkel
    200 pull free w/p&b
    300 swim back & free

    Main Set #1: with fins
    4 x 200/20sr - Last 50 is stroke - no back!
    (odds did free with fly on last 50 (2:50), evens did back with breast on last 50 (3:15))

    Main set #2
    10 x 50/1:00 Odds-smooth swim Evens - very strong kick
    (swam free on odds (40-41), evens kicked on back (52-53))

    Cool down:
    4 x 100/2 min smooth
    (back went 1:32-34 with 16-17spl)

    4 x 50: 1 on 55, 1 on 50, 1 on 55, and last 50 on 60


    Total:3000 yards
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  14. The sun is a mass of incandescent gas

    by , October 5th, 2010 at 11:44 AM (Too Neurotic to be Suitably Aquatic)
    I made a great music mix to go with the constant rain that has been hydrating the Hudson Valley last week and this week (with sunny weekends, huzzah!) However, Coach says that the pool speakers are still busted, so no music. I pretty much believe him...

    So instead, I just swam and swam and swam, there were a bunch of 500's to do.

    75 swim (dive start)
    400 IM order k, drill, k, swim
    10 x 50 odd drill, even swim
    500 good streamlines off walls
    500 pull
    5x100 on 1:30 <--- made it!
    10x50 odd swim, even drill
    10x50 25 fly, 25 stroke

    didn't get to...
    5x100 choice
    2x50 under / over
    10x25
    200 warm down

    It felt nice. And then I was the last one in the pool after the lane lines came out, so I got to play around like a dolphin. That's always my favorite part of being in the water. I love swimming diagonally from corner to corner, doing corkscrews, dolphin dives, just feeling the water, especially after a hard practice.
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  15. Moving ok this morning but it is chillie here

    by , October 5th, 2010 at 07:32 AM (Mixing it up this year)
    I did not want to dive into the cold water but did finally do it.

    1000 as 200Swim/pull/swim/kick/swim
    500 Free kick w/fins every 3rd lap fast
    5x100@1:30 Free kick w/fins
    5x200@3:15 as 100free/100back w/paddles and bouy
    500 Free w/snorkle alt 100 swim/100 kick

    Total 3500 yards
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  16. Monday, 10/4/10

    by , October 4th, 2010 at 06:26 PM (A comfort swimmer's guide to easy swimming)
    SCY with Carrie

    300 Mix of free & back
    4 x 75/1:15 Build
    (did free, went 1:00± on these)
    4 x 50/50 desc
    (did backstroke, went 45->42)
    4 x 25/30 (went fly-free-fly-free)

    Swim (1500)
    4 x 100/1:45 ds free
    (went 1:25->1:18)
    8 x 25/40 Fast
    (free-back-fly(2x),free-back; free around 16, back 18, fly 17)
    3 x 100/1:40 ds free
    (went 1:23->1:20)
    6 x 25/45 Fast
    (fly-back-free(2x), free around 16, back 18, fly 17)
    2 x 100/1:35 desc free
    (went 1:25, 1:22)
    4 x 25/50 Fast
    (free-back-fly-free, free around 16, back 18, fly 17)
    1 x 100/1:30 build free
    (went 1:22)
    2 x 25/55 Fast
    (back-free, free around 16, back 18)

    Kicks (900)
    Fins: Kick 10 x 50/1:00 Very Strong
    (1-5 w/board alt flutter and dolphin, times 35-38, 6-10 on back times around 37)
    No Fins: Kick 8 x 50/1:15 Very Strong
    (1-4 flutter w/board, times around 50-52, 5-8 flutter on back times around 55)

    Cool down
    100 easy back & free

    Total 3400 yards
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  17. Nada, Oct. 24

    by , October 4th, 2010 at 05:04 PM (The FAF AFAP Digest)
    Finally gave in and decided to rest. Too many coughing, breathing and asthma issues. So today is my 4th day out of the water. I don't think 30 minutes on Saturday really counts. Not sure I'll get in tomorrow either, as I'm in Lil Fort's class in the am and getting my foot jabbed in the pm. In light of all this, I think Indy at the end of the month is out for me. I won't be ready and I had wanted to attempt to swim fairly fast there. So I guess I'll reboot and aim for another SCM meet in December.

    Updated October 4th, 2010 at 05:09 PM by The Fortress

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  18. Fall open-water swimming

    This past weekend I had two wonderful swims out at Brighton Beach with the CIBBOWS group. Saturday was pretty much a perfect beach day—air temps in the high 60s, sunny, water around 70, little wind, and very few jellies or other mysterious critters in the water. I stayed in the water for about 1.5 hours, most of it swimming, but some of it just floating around and looking at the scenery. It was heavenly. I’ve felt somewhat tentative and ill at ease as I’ve reacquainted myself with the ocean this fall. Saturday was the first day that I truly felt like the water loved me and that I wanted to stay in it forever. That’s what I think open water swimming is supposed to feel like!

    On Sunday the conditions were a bit tougher. The weather had cooled—the air temp seemed to stay at 50 all day long—the sun was in and out, and it was definitely windy. The water temp had only cooled by a few degrees, though, so it was still very comfortable. I ended up doing the entire 5K course with my swim buddy Hannah—the first time I’d actually swum the whole way. It really helps to have someone of comparable speed to swim with—if I had been by myself I would have been sorely tempted to stop sooner.

    There was considerable chop in the opposite direction of the current on Sunday, so if you swam in one direction you felt like you were being carried forward by the waves, but in reality you were going very slowly. In the other direction you actually got wherever you were heading pretty quickly, but really felt like you were being tossed backward and buffeted by the water. I enjoyed turning over and doing backstroke when swimming against the current and watching the waves break over my head.

    When I was swimming against the current, I tried out several freestyle variations. When I watch good open-water swimmers, they all seem to have a considerably faster turn-over than me, so I tried using shorter strokes and a quicker turnover for a while. But that just seemed to increase the number of times my arms ran right into the waves in a way that made any useful pulling difficult. I also tried doing more of a catch-up stroke, and using that forward arm to help my body ride along the waves. Maybe what worked best, though, was combining this catch-up stroke with an exaggerated rotation, and actually kicking while doing so. It did feel more like I could knife through the moving water on my side, but maybe that was just an illusion. It was fun playing around with different stuff, anyway.

    As the weather and water gets colder I’ll be experimenting with things to do to stay warm during my swims. I’ve been reading this cold-water thread on the discussion forums and taking note of the tips there. I’ve never worn earplugs before, but I’ve bought a pair and stowed them in my OW bag for when the temps drop. Swimmers were also double-capping on Sunday, so I can try that too. I’ve ordered a neoprene cap, but won’t wear it unless I absolutely have to to endure the cold.

    For after the swim, several people bought hot thermoses on Sunday, and sips of cocoa did feel really good. I think I”ll try that. And I really like knowing warm clothes are waiting for me after my swim. This weekend a sweater and swim parka sufficed (along with hat and mittens), but as the weather gets colder some ski pants and sheepskin boots might just make a field trip to the beach as toasty après-swim wear.

    The one thing I forgot on Saturday was some sort of lubricant to avoid suit/pit chafing, and I ended up with both. I used some on Sunday and don’t think anything got worse. But until my suit chafing heals, I need to find another OW swimsuit that hits me at a different spot under my left arm. Here’s the suit that chafed me:


    I like wearing it in open water because it is unlined, so sea lice or other stuff in the water doesn’t get stuck between the lining and the suit.

    I went through my suit drawer today to see if I had any other unlined suits I could wear. Here’s what I found:





    A friend gave me this European Arena suit a few years ago, and I’ve only worn it a few times. With no lining, it’s a little sheer for pool swimming. However, those white patches and the arena logos along the sides are iridescent, and I’ve read that some predatory fish are attracted to shiny objects, so I’m a little worried about wearing this in the ocean.




    I originally bought this Japanese Speedo as a competition suit, but it’s gotten a bit stretched out. I might convert it to an OW suit. But if I do, I don’t have any backup competition legless suits to wear at meets. And that’s a useful option to have for casual meets, or outdoor ones held in hot pools like the Wilton meet this summer. Then again, having a reason to shop for a new competition suit might not be so bad!



    This is an old Nike polyester suit. It might well do—I’ll have to test it out on a shorter swim, because polyester suits seem more likely to chafe me than regular ones. I’ve worn it tons, but it still looks like new.



    I’m ashamed to admit how many years I’ve had this sad-looking Dolfin suit. It was a grabbagger, and I always avoided wearing it for 2 reasons: (1) it reminded me of my hideous junior-high gym uniform, and (2) the lining and the suit seem to be different sizes—there’s way more lining than suit here. So I was thinking I could cut out the lining, and have a serviceable OW swimsuit. Has anyone ever tried delining a suit before?

    I’m worried that with the stretchy fabric it will be hard to cut the lining out without either cutting the suit or leaving in enough lining to cause chafing problems. But if I’m ever going to try this with a suit, it might as well be this one, since I will not shed any tears if it ends up not working.
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  19. Final Solution for Fatties Like Me

    by , October 4th, 2010 at 03:45 PM (Vlog the Inhaler, or The Occasional Video Blog Musings of Jim Thornton)


    My first two weight loss techniques:

    A) Stop Eating, and

    B) Chastity Belt Adapted for Buccal Cavity/Yawning Maw

    have, alas, failed to provide the miracle breakthrough for weight loss I'd hoped for.

    The former proved surprisingly impossible to sustain for longer than seven or eight minutes at a time. And the latter, unfortunately, could just not survive the wicked mechanical forces of my rasper organ of a mouth. This, apparently like a Dyson vacuum cleaner, NEVER LOSES SUCTION.

    I am forced, thus, to go back to the only absolutely 100 percent guaranteed remedy: a broken heart, or, because I have become much too fat of late to attract anybody who could then cruelly reject me, a facsimile of a broken heart.

    And so, ladies and gentlemen, my fellow rotundity victims and would be Hunger Artists, I present to you the third in my Triptych of Weight Loss Methods. I think you will soon see that I have saved the best for last with...

    Jim’s Melancholia Spa ®

    ______________________________
    Depressed about your weight, butterball?

    Evidently, not depressed enough!

    At Jim’s Melancholia Spa ® we specialize in helping you lose weight fast--without dangerous diet drugs or even potentially heart-stopping light-to-moderate exercise prescriptions.

    Our philosophy couldn’t be simpler:

    Lose the will to live, lose the will to eat! ®

    When you first check in (no shoe laces, please!), our crack team of psychiatric nurse practitioners will administer medicines to deplete your brain of serotonin, noradrenaline, and a host of other neurotransmitters associated with feelings of well-being. Soon, you’ll have no appetite left for anything--sex, life, and most importantly, food-- which is just as well because the only “nourishment” we provide at Jim’s Melancholia Spa ® is synthetic potato chips fried in Olestra and flavored with aspartame!

    Yum, yum!

    Wink, wink!

    If you can stomach “three squares a day” of this proprietary Melancholia Spa Foodstuff Staple ®, you’ll lose weight even faster than most, thanks to the virtual certainty of acidic anal emissions!

    Acidic or not, at Jim’s, we see every kind of elimination as a good thing. For this reason, there will be no shortage of purgatives and Ipecac provided gratis to all our guests.

    Unlike trendy “fun” spas that promise the weight-loss moon but measure “success” in ounces, Jim’s Melancholia Spa ® is not set near some picturesque beach where the balmy breezes blow, keeping spirits high. You can find us instead in an underground cavern in Missouri (pronounced “misery,” pun intended!) tucked ever so deep inside the earth’s crust and ever so far removed from the green sunlit comforts of surface life.

    Indeed, at Jim’s Melancholia Spa ®, we pride ourselves on bringing you...A Little Closer to Hell ®.

    It’s a cold hell, too. Day or night, winter or summer, the temperature in our pitch black underworld never gets above or below an uncomfortable 52 degrees F. We let you keep your underwear, even provide you with a horsehair blanket to cover yourself as you curl up in fetal position around a wet stalagmite. Most of our guests, however, become so forlorn they eventually abdicate their wet blankets altogether.

    As certain medical researchers in Germany discovered during the late 30s and early 40s, the only thing better than despondency at triggering weight loss is despondency stoked by hypothermia!

    For guests with proof of health insurance, our Tough Lovin’ Staffers ®--the best brutal blackguards you could ever hope to have care for you!--will offer the special a la carte Close Shave ® option. You show them the money, and they’ll hand you a straight razor and turn their backs for up to 15 minutes while you “freshen up.” To be sure, our crack team of vascular surgery nurse practitioners will be Johnny-on-the-spot to repair any weight-draining mischief you get yourself into!


    ____

    "It is as if any appreciable time spent in Jim’s Melancholia Spa ® changes one forever."

    ____

    No matter whether you choose the two-month, six-month, or deluxe ten-year Spa packages, we guarantee that when you once again ascend from the bowels of the earth to stand in the light of day, there will be a much thinner you thereupon standing. Our long-term guests, once morbidly obese, invariably find themselves transformed into wraiths who sport the hollow eyes and sunken cheeks that for so many of us define physical attractiveness. We can’t name names, but suffice it to say: some of the top fashion models working today got their start as tubby teens whose parents loved them enough to send them to Jim’s Melancholia Spa Summer Camp for Fat Girls ®.

    But what about relapse rates, you’re probably wondering. You’re probably well aware of the statistics of weight loss--the 95 percent long-term failure rate of virtually every diet known to man. Talk about depressing!

    Please know too that our program truly is different, and tiny is the number of recidivists that eventually leave our cavern. It is as if any appreciable time spent in Jim’sMelancholia Spa ® changes one forever.

    But in the unlikely event you do eventually begin to perk and pork up again, don’t quietly despair! Despair grandly, ever while knowing that Jim’s Melancholia Spa ® awaits like a booster shot, loaded with all the encouraging discouragement you need to wither your way back to ideal weight and less!

    __________________________________________

    Categories
    Uncategorized
  20. Sarasota Y Sharks Masters 5:30 AM Workout -10/05/10

    by , October 4th, 2010 at 03:02 PM (Sarasota Y Sharks Masters 5:30 a.m. Workout)
    SCY
    WARM UP:
    2 X 200 3:00
    3 X 150 2:15
    4 X 100 1:30
    6 X 50 :50

    1 X 200 3:00 2:50 2:40
    3 x 100 1:30 1:25 1:20
    3 X 50 FAST 1:00 1:00 1:00
    Three times through. Round 1 intervals left, 2middle, 3 right.

    1 X 100 kick 2:10
    4 x 50 kick 1:00
    Twice through.

    1 X 50 easy 1:15
    1 X 50 build 1:00
    1 X 50 FAST 1:00
    Repeat 6 times, total 18 50's.
    All choice, focus on the six fast ones.

    WARM DOWN: 4 X 50 easy 1:00

    5200Y
    Categories
    Swim Workouts