Hairstyles for Twins and other Taper Distractions
by, May 16th, 2010 at 02:04 PM (3401 Views)
Many of you are going to Nationals and hence have probably begun to cut your yardage down for the so-called "taper" period.
Two-a-day workouts consisting of 16,000 meters per session have been reduced by at least 10 percent. I daresay some of the lazier masters swimmers are swimming no more than 12,000 meters total per day now, all in order to let their bodies "rest."
Alas, when the body rests, the mind is free to run particularly riotous, or at least that is my experience.
Perhaps some of you are feeling odd sensations in your shoulders and have begun to speculate on S.L.A.P. lesions and rotator cuff fraying. Perhaps digestive irregularities have caused you to wonder if a diet consisting on 10 percent fruits and vegetables, 10 percent whole grains, 10 percent small sticks you have found in the woods, and 70 percent Activia yogurt has been, perhaps, a bit ill-advised?
Who wants to swim Nationals feeling slightly bloated?
Hence your mind ruminates over and over again on whether today is the right time to drop the fruits, vegetables, and whole grains entirely, and go to the oft-recommended 100 percent small-sticks-and-Activia diet?
If you are thinking such thoughts, chances are you are in need of a major distraction.
Just as a magnificent race horse can only be calmed down by the presence, in his or her barn stall, of a friendly pony, goat, or some other cuddly friend animal, so does your current swimming thoroughbred status--oh, you know who you are, you magnificent specimens, you!--require the assistance of a little fuzzy animal friend or two to calm you down before your own big show in Atlanta.
My twin brother John and I are more than willing to be those comical little animal friends for you.
In this spirit, we have made a short film that is IMPOSSIBLE NOT TO LIKE A LOT.
It is on a subject that is of no little tangential interest to swimmers, as well: hair.
To be sure, in this, the final swan song of the high tech body suit for men, the issue of hair is perhaps not quite so feverish as it will be next year at this time.
But it is still of some interest.
My brother told me this morning, "You are really going to have to like us to like this movie."
He may be right. But I am betting that even people who hate us, or at the very least do not like us or are somewhat indifferent to us, will nevertheless like this movie regardless of their lack of affection for the hirsute protagonists.
To reiterate: unlike some of my other efforts lately, this is a short film that is IMPOSSIBLE NOT TO LIKE A LOT.
Especially if you watch it quite a number of times and let it grow on you.
I dare you to prove me wrong.
Good luck at Nationals; good luck with the small sticks and Activia diet; and good luck managing to stifle your affection reflex for the Thornton twins and their glorious manes of hair from toe to shining heads.
[nomedia="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3YsDUUysELg"]YouTube- How to Hairdress Your Identical Twin[/nomedia]