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Thread: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

  1. #1
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    I invite my various colleagues in the world of swimming to watch a movie that my twin brother, John, made about my recent loss in the non-swimming world of the National Magazine Awards. I hope you will find this amusing. I credit swimming with teaching me how to lose, over and over again, and continue nevertheless to keep at it.

    You can find the move, 3 Time Loser, The James Thornton Story, at:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sYTd7qrzeQg

    Thanks for watching. None of my brother's video's have ever gone "viral" but with your help, perhaps this one could! Simply forward the link to one hundred thousand of your friends, and ask them to do similarly.

    Thanks again!

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    Very Active Member geochuck's Avatar
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    Talking Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Great little video. When I get to Mexico next week I will send this video story to the world. I will embed it onto my web page and let everyone know what a loser you are
    Keep it simple George Park
    Swimsuit Sale http://www.swimdownhill.com/index.html

  3. #3
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Thanks, George! Anything to help news of me as a loser spread across the human fraternity, from here to Madagascar to even California!

  4. #4
    Very Active Member geochuck's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    I have made the annoucement to several people already.
    Quote Originally Posted by jim thornton View Post
    Thanks, George! Anything to help news of me as a loser spread across the human fraternity, from here to Madagascar to even California!
    Keep it simple George Park
    Swimsuit Sale http://www.swimdownhill.com/index.html

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    Very Active Member ALM's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Quote Originally Posted by jim thornton View Post
    I invite my various colleagues in the world of swimming to watch a movie that my twin brother, John, made about my recent loss in the non-swimming world of the National Magazine Awards. I hope you will find this amusing. I credit swimming with teaching me how to lose, over and over again, and continue nevertheless to keep at it.

    Jim, your brother's films are hilarious. We're laughing with you, not at you. Really.

    Anna Lea

  6. #6
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    When it comes to laughter anywhere around me, I don't mind what the preposition is! With, at: it's all good.

    With apologies to Oscar Wilde, "The only thing worse than being laughed at is not being laughed at."

    Or maybe being put in prison, as we were to later learn in De Profundus, but that's another story.

    For what it's worth, the video has yet to "go viral." Please continue to send it out to 100,000s of your associates. I have a theory that if you can become famous for ANYTHING in these here United States, it will make you rich. Given the demographics of our beloved sport, I think it's time there was at least one wealthy masters swimmer somewhere in America, and I would love to assume that mantle.

    Thanks for your help in this regard. Who knows? With enough mad money, I might even be able to buy that other guy's signed 2000 Olympic team banner!

  7. #7
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Made me smile.

    Thanks

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    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    You and your one hundred thousand associates are more than welcome!

  9. #9
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    A brief update!

    There have now been 355 hits on my brother's YouTube movie about me as a loser!

    That means only 999,645 more viewings, and we will have hit the 1 million viewer mark!

    thanks for your help. i am feeling more like a virus with each passing moment!

  10. #10
    sprint diva The Fortress's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Thank god the facebook cartoons and pony photo made the cut! Bravo!

  11. #11
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Leslie, your pony was the highlite of the entire video. I forgot to get a video release. Please, please don't sue even though I know you can!

  12. #12
    Very Active Member Peter Cruise's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Jim, I think Anderson Cooper 360 is looking at you as a filler piece between tornado footage...
    Life keeps throwing curve balls; the trick, I'm learning, is to duck...

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    Very Active Member Leonard Jansen's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    If it has any girl-on-girl beach scissoring in it, I'm not watching - that scarred me for life.

    -LBJ
    "Excitable boy" they all said.

  14. #14
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Peter and Leonard,

    I would be thrilled to be Anderson Cooper tornado filler--a way of letting the viewer experience minor loss and thus ease him or her into the more heavy duty variety.

    Leonard, there is no scissoring, or even scissoring reenactment, in the latest film (though God knows I tried).

    However, there is a fairly graphic visualization, through props (knife, Heinz Ketchup bottle), showing what I went through years ago when testing out a pre-Viagra impotence cure: i.e., a "transurethral microsuppository pellet."

    This alone is worth watching the movie 17 or 18 times in row, if for no other reason than to make even the most depressing life seem happy by comparison.

  15. #15
    sprint diva The Fortress's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Quote Originally Posted by Leonard Jansen View Post
    If it has any girl-on-girl beach scissoring in it, I'm not watching - that scarred me for life.

    -LBJ
    Masters swimmers are apparently very adept at scissoring, LBJ. lol The ketchup scene was much scarier!
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails Click image for larger version. 

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  16. #16
    Very Active Member knelson's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Paper Penis huh?

    Hey, George Plimpton may be more famous than you, but on the bright side you're still alive...

  17. #17
    Very Active Member swimshark's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    514 hits and counting!! Great video and I love that the pony shot got in.

  18. #18
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Thanks for the recent observations that A) unlike George Plimpton, I am still alive, B) that transurethral microsuppository pellet insertion lacks the beauty of girl on girl scissoring, and C) that there will always be something compelling about a man's love for his plastic horsehead.

    My brother's film is chock-a-block full of such subtleties ripe for re-veiewing!

    At 514 hits, we are poised on the precipice of the tipping point! 999486 more hits, and we will be at the first million mark!

    Please continue to view, and more importantly, re-view!

    Thanks!

  19. #19
    Very Active Member Leonard Jansen's Avatar
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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Quote Originally Posted by jim thornton View Post
    However, there is a fairly graphic visualization, through props (knife, Heinz Ketchup bottle), showing what I went through years ago when testing out a pre-Viagra impotence cure: i.e., a "transurethral microsuppository pellet."
    That doesn't phase me - I've had two prostate biopsies without anesthesia. (Anyone who thinks we don't need health care reform should try this after your health insurance bandits refuse to pay for anesthesia. If I ever get my hands on these weasels, I'll reenact it on them with a toilet snake attached to my electric drill.) Not to mention being catheterized after having to drop out of the Manhattan Island Marathon Swim.

    But beach-scissoring... dear God... the horror, the horror....

    -LBJ
    "Excitable boy" they all said.

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    Re: new non-swimming video about a non-swimming loss

    Damn, clicked on it looking for girl-on-girl beach scissoring and got a penile micro-suppository reenactment using catsup and a dull butter knife instead, which is now indelibly burned onto my poor mind's eye. That will teach me to read more carefully before clicking.

    Julia Allison's fluffy marshmallows almost made it right, but not quite.
    At this point in the development of our society, there is virtually no writing which has not been plagiarized at least in part from another. I read that somewhere.

    This was no boating accident.


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