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Thread: Diversion for Conventionites

  1. #1
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Diversion for Conventionites

    For those of you USMS convention goers sitting in what I presume is a large corporate-style meeting suite, pouring over critical bureaucratic minutiae, eating Duncan Donuts, and drinking coffee in a hopeless effort to remain fully conscious, I would like to propose a brief diversion that might restore your flagging energies AND offer sage dietary counsel at the same time.

    Set your laptop on panic button mode so that if the Powerful Overlords happen to wander by to make sure you are attending to business, you can press this button and have your screen instantly go back to the pros and cons of Codicil 6a to Proposal IX, subsections 4-9, "Can we make an exception for Jim Thornton to wear women's suits?"

    Now, with panic button mode thusly set, click on the following two links, which will help you survive the rest of the next few days without gaining any more than 30-40 lbs.

    No Mr. Bond. I expect you to DIEt:
    http://forums.usms.org/blog.php?b=11518

    Adapting Medieval Technology to Modern Weight Loss:
    http://forums.usms.org/blog.php?bt=45709

  2. #2
    Very Active Member chowmi's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Come to the Baylor noon workout today! A few conventionites had their hall passes and came yesterday!

  3. #3
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Quote Originally Posted by chowmi View Post
    Come to the Baylor noon workout today! A few conventionites had their hall passes and came yesterday!
    I'd love to, Michelle! But I am in Pittsburgh, sympathizing at a distance with the consciousness-challenged attendees.

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    Very Active Member swimmieAvsFan's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    i've heard the HOD room doesn't have wireless access...

    Mollie Grover
    Potomac Valley Top Ten Recorder
    USMS Rules committee

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    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Quote Originally Posted by swimmieAvsFan View Post
    i've heard the HOD room doesn't have wireless access...
    Those nefarious Overlords have thought of everything!

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    Won Slowest Swimmer Award bzaks1424's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Quote Originally Posted by jim thornton View Post
    Those nefarious Overlords have thought of everything!
    Quick! Someone set up Wireless Tether on their rooted Android phone! (Download here)
    "Fran operated under the assumption that oneís ability to cope with the travails of daily life fluctuates in direct proportion to oneís willingness to work through hurt." -Ian Prichard

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    Very Active Member mermaid's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Tis true -- no internet connections in the HOD unless you have an aircard.

    Jim - there was/is some discussion about the men's and women's suits being the same top/bottom portions . . . I think 5 min.'s of discussion.
    Come live with me in the sea said she,
    Down on the ocean floor
    And I'll show you many's a wonderous thing
    That you've never seen before

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    Very Active Member gdanner's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Quote Originally Posted by bzaks1424 View Post
    Quick! Someone set up Wireless Tether on their rooted Android phone! (Download here)
    Well, the convention is over, but I thought I would post this anyways.

    I'm guessing not too many people will have rooted phones here, haha. For non-rooted phones, here is wireless tethering: http://www.junefabrics.com/android/.

    On the final HOD meeting, my laptop was able to pick up a wireless signal. Depending on the NIC and OS, many people might not have been able to get it due to the poor signal quality.

  9. #9
    Paint test area ahead Michael Heather's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    The larger question is why you all were trying to acquire internet connections while attending the house of delegates meetings. Your attention should be to the reports, not facebook.

    Diversion at those times is not necessary, in fact, it is contrary to the efforts of many people in assembling reports that will guide committee operations for the coming year.
    The opinions expressed in the above post are mine, not those of U.S. Masters Swimming. But maybe they should be.

  10. #10
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    The human mind, when forced to attend to minutiae hour after hour, day after day, turns stale.

    At such times, a welcome diversion for conventionites--while seeming at the moment to be a waste of time--is, in fact, a perfect cognitive palette cleanser, allowing stale and stultified brain matter, benumbed by bureaucracy, to refresh itself and thus think with even more acuity later!

    An example of just such a perfect diversion for conventionites can be found here:

    http://forums.usms.org/blog.php?bt=62253

    here:

    http://forums.usms.org/blog.php?bt=62505

    and here:

    http://forums.usms.org/blog.php?bt=62608

    I do, however, concede Michael does have a partial point.

    Please do not spend more than one or two hours, maximum, per day during the HOD sessions reading the above diversions and refreshing your minds. Too much staring at CremePuff in her Cialis bikini, for example, can actually become enervating as opposed to energizing.

    Moderation in all things, stale-minded delegates!

    That has always been, and shall always be, my counsel!

  11. #11
    Very Calm Member jim clemmons's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Quote Originally Posted by jim thornton View Post
    The human mind, when forced to attend to minutiae hour after hour, day after day, turns stale.

    At such times, a welcome diversion for conventionites--while seeming at the moment to be a waste of time--is, in fact, a perfect cognitive palette cleanser, allowing stale and stultified brain matter, benumbed by bureaucracy, to refresh itself and thus think with even more acuity later!

    An example of just such a perfect diversion for conventionites can be found here:

    http://forums.usms.org/blog.php?bt=62253

    here:

    http://forums.usms.org/blog.php?bt=62505

    and here:

    http://forums.usms.org/blog.php?bt=62608

    I do, however, concede Michael does have a partial point.

    Please do not spend more than one or two hours, maximum, per day during the HOD sessions reading the above diversions and refreshing your minds. Too much staring at CremePuff in her Cialis bikini, for example, can actually become enervating as opposed to energizing.

    Moderation in all things, stale-minded delegates!

    That has always been, and shall always be, my counsel!
    Jeeze, if only I'd known...I can't believe what I've been missing!

    Jimbo, you are in the wrong business, my friend.
    Jim

  12. #12
    Paint test area ahead Michael Heather's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Quote Originally Posted by jim thornton View Post
    The human mind, when forced to attend to minutiae hour after hour, day after day, turns stale.

    At such times, a welcome diversion for conventionites--while seeming at the moment to be a waste of time--is, in fact, a perfect cognitive palette cleanser, allowing stale and stultified brain matter, benumbed by bureaucracy, to refresh itself and thus think with even more acuity later!
    Later, as when they are pickled with beer and wine, they can rely upon their rediscovered mental acuity to argue an even smaller point of minutiae?

    And if you are not going to use the correct terminology - delegates - don't use the lazy out by calling them that fetid, putrid, effete name. Try something even less creative. Like convention goers. Attendees. Participants (although in some cases that is something of a stretch).

    -ites? Sounds like a bunch of them in one place would qualify as a swarm.

    Back to my point. And the point of the convention. The time wasted in the HOD trying to play the Google game or find Waldo is time stolen from your LMSC, which (in most cases) paid for you to get there and paid for your room. Even trying to access the USMS website is useless because there isn't anything there that will help, not even blogosaurus rex.
    The opinions expressed in the above post are mine, not those of U.S. Masters Swimming. But maybe they should be.

  13. #13
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Quote Originally Posted by jim clemmons View Post
    Jeeze, if only I'd known...I can't believe what I've been missing!

    Jimbo, you are in the wrong business, my friend.
    Thanks, Mr. Clemmons! Would you consider, for the right price, wearing my dual advertising suit equivalent of a mullet haircut, for which the slogan has long been "business up front, party in the back"?

    Only my suit reverses this order--party up front, business in the back.

    It would be, of course, the Cialis ad in the front and the Depends ad in the back.

    Quote Originally Posted by Michael Heather View Post
    -ites? Sounds like a bunch of them in one place would qualify as a swarm.
    From what I have heard about these legendary weekends, many in the swarm use the occasion the same way that insects do: a profligate mating opportunity.

    I think, given the circumstances, the "delegates" should pay for their own rooms.

  14. #14
    Very Active Member gdanner's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Quote Originally Posted by Michael Heather View Post
    Even trying to access the USMS website is useless because there isn't anything there that will help.
    I'm not sure I follow. The USMS site has a variety of documents that are relevant to HOD discussions. Aside from the convention specific material and rule book, there are also reasons to reference USAS materials or other organizations (OW) for ideas. It's far easier to look this up on the spot and keyword search docs instead of printing everything out ahead of time.
    NI LMSC Chair/Webmaster - http://www.niagaramasters.org
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  15. #15
    Moderator Rob Copeland's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Quote Originally Posted by gdanner View Post
    The USMS site has a variety of documents that are relevant to HOD discussions
    Have you got any examples?


    Quote Originally Posted by gdanner View Post
    Aside from the convention specific material and rule book, there are also reasons to reference USAS materials or other organizations (OW) for ideas.
    The House of Delegates meetings are pretty tightly packed with reports and actions for the House. The time searching the net for ideas is the other 361 days in the year.


    Quote Originally Posted by gdanner View Post
    It's far easier to look this up on the spot and keyword search docs instead of printing everything out ahead of time.
    I agree this works well for the pre-convention materials. I download the convention packet and read it on my PC, highlighting and making notes where needed. However, in the House of Delegates meetings we receive the committee reports on paper; there is no available electronic copy at that time. So between the downloaded convention materials and the hardcopy reports, there is no need to go on-line.

    Iíve been attending USAS conventions for a few years now, and from what Iíve seen 98+% of those folks on-line during HOD meetings are not looking up references on the items being discussed. They are checking emails, facebook, youtube, and other things that distract their attention from the speaker.

  16. #16
    Very Active Member gdanner's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Quote Originally Posted by Rob Copeland View Post
    The House of Delegates meetings are pretty tightly packed with reports and actions for the House. The time searching the net for ideas is the other 361 days in the year.
    I agree that is usually appropriate. I was (am still relatively) new to the administrative side of USMS and was a very late change to become the TTR of our LMSC. I knew for sure I would be a delegate at last year's convention only a few weeks ahead of time. When delegates are discussing occasionally trivial matters such as grammar changes to rules, I was taking the time to read whatever I could get my hands on.
    NI LMSC Chair/Webmaster - http://www.niagaramasters.org
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  17. #17
    Very Active Member jim thornton's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    Quote Originally Posted by gdanner View Post
    When delegates are discussing occasionally trivial matters such as grammar changes to rules, I was taking the time to read whatever I could get my hands on.
    I think you mean:

    When delegates are discussing occasionally trivial matters such as grammar changes to rules, I was taking the time to read whatever on which I could get my hands.

  18. #18
    Paint test area ahead Michael Heather's Avatar
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    Re: Diversion for Conventionites

    The officers and directors are fully aware of what is happening on the floor of the house, we have all been there. What we are unable to do is keep everyone's attention for the entire time during the HOD meetings because of their tendency to become tedious. Pick a few of your favorite (or high expertise) subjects and concentrate on them. As long as you remember and respect that there are people who have a keen interest and passion for other subjects, everything is good.

    I would rather have most of the house sitting looking at their phones or computers rather than have them palavering, slowing the process. I would far prefer that they all stayed engaged in the process. That would reap real benefits and progress for USMS.
    The opinions expressed in the above post are mine, not those of U.S. Masters Swimming. But maybe they should be.

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